Embracing a Spacious Tomorrow
The Summer of Renovations continues with a house purge to end all house purges. I’m so tired. It’s been a long time coming, my friends.
So, my horoscope today was most encouraging: “Find comfort in your work today, Scorpio…. checking things off your list is the most rewarding activity today… Mountains that seem too daunting to climb will continue to grow bigger until you take the first step upward. Your perseverance will inspire others.”
Yes, I’m tired, but I’m also energized at all the fresh space that’s appearing!
Because we’re moving walls in our kitchen, we’re replacing and updating all our cabinets and appliances. It’s a splurge, no doubt, but I set aside my bred-in-the-bone waste-not-want-not frugality in light of getting a gas cooktop – and a steam oven! Oh, the fun I will have! Plus, all our current cabinets and appliances will be going to new homes, so it’s win-win.
But before that can happen, everything has to be emptied. Everything.
We’re also replacing all the flooring (five cats, four dogs and three birds took a toll) so all the furniture has to be moved to the basement. Everything.
It’s a purge of massive proportions.
So far I’ve taken six carloads (I think, maybe more) to Goodwill. The phone desk and junk drawers in the kitchen are empty. The laundry room is empty. Six closets have been purged and reorganized. Today I’m clearing the pantry and china cabinet. The room over the garage is totally empty, ready to become what the builder calls a “nanny suite.” One day, for real estate purposes, I’ll call it that, I suppose, but for us, it’s a guest suite. In this house, for now, the time of children is past.
Which is what gives this process such emotional weight, for me.
The thought of clearing this house has been a dark, shadowy mountain looming over me for the better part of a decade, since my chicks started leaving the nest. Our last one left for good a couple of years ago and letting go of her, of them, of that stage of life, gutted me in a way I did not expect. This is a family house, where we ate meals around the table, played games, cared for all those pets. Those front stairs have seen three prom dresses and one wedding dress. Here is where we finished raising them, for better or worse.
It feels like an ending. But it’s also a beginning. This is where we started clumsily building the foundations of adult relationships with our daughters. This is where we started navigating our marriage as a couple now without children.
The stuff represents so much…. life. So much love. But there’s so much more living and loving in store for us. Clearing away the stuff that no longer serves us now makes room for what lies ahead.
So I continue to climb the mountain, and will take comfort in checking tasks off my list today, lovingly letting go of yesterday to embrace a spacious tomorrow.
There. Does my perseverance inspire you? 🙂